Gratitude
“Gratitude arises from paying attention, from being awake in the presence of everything that lives within and without us.”
- David Whyte
I wanted to use this piece of prose from David Whyte, a great poet and philosopher, who I have followed for over 20 years. His poetry, his conversations and his truth has helped me through difficult times and times of huge doubt. I actually got the chance to meet him in Queenstown in 2018 when he came to do a poetry workshop - and all I can say is this - I was in the room with magnificence – he was authentic, beautiful and vulnerable, reading us his poetry, inviting us to have the “conversation”.
One of the things we can practice having the conversation around is Gratitude. On the mat I talk about the importance of Gratitude as there is plenty of evidence that shows gratitude changes everything. When we express gratitude and receive the same, our brain releases dopamine and serotonin, the two crucial neurotransmitters responsible for our emotions, and they make us feel 'good'. They enhance our mood immediately, making us feel happy from the inside.
However, from my own experience (and that’s all I can speak from) is that it is hard to feel grateful when you don’t.
In this uncertain time of Covid-19, there has been and still is loss, uncertainty, doubt and heartbreak. On the mat we would call this the “rebound” - staying with what is.
So, with this first blog I thought gratitude was a good offering of something that you can do to support and enhance what you do have. Below are some ideas to think about, to take action on and then notice how it feels, as things change.
Keep a gratitude journal. I do this every day - first thing in the morning and last thing at night. At the beginning of the day I write down things I am looking forward to, (yoga is always there) gratitude for my friends, family, events. My list often starts with – I am grateful for my breathe, my body, my bed, my cuppa tea, my candles that I light, my toothbrush, my car…..start slowly, and be honest, go gently. At the end of the day I reflect on all the things I am grateful for, I often reflect also on things I could have done better or would change. There are no rules, you decide. Buy yourself a journal, I like to use blank pages and do it more in a mind map style, using coloured pens, pictures and key words. Start slowly, find 3-6 things you can be grateful for and see how it develops.
Write a thank-you note. You can make yourself happier and nurture your relationship with another person by writing a thank-you letter expressing your enjoyment and appreciation of that person's impact on your life. Send it, or better yet, deliver and read it in person if possible. Make a habit of sending at least one gratitude letter a month. Once in a while, write one to yourself.
Thank someone mentally. No time to write? It may help just to think about someone who has done something nice for you, and mentally thank the individual. This is something you can do on the mat at yoga or in the car at the traffic lights.
Meditate. Mindfulness meditation involves focusing on the present moment without judgment. Although people often focus on a word or phrase (such as "peace"), it is also possible to focus on what you're grateful for (the warmth of the sun, a pleasant sound, etc.).
Do something you love. Find what brings you joy, in which time becomes timeless, when you feel lighter, whether it is playing with the children, the dog, painting, dancing, singing, gardening, yoga, walking, reading, having a bath, lighting candles, a fire, walking barefoot on the beach, eating ice-cream, visiting someone, reading poetry, writing, sleeping in….it doesn’t matter what it is – give yourself something for you, something you love.
When I first started a gratitude journal I was in such a dark place that I found it hard to be grateful as I was so focused on what I didn’t have, on the heart-break and way my life was at that time. Hard to believe now, however true. Change the way you feel and the way you feel changes, and that takes action, takes conscious effort.
If you wish to explore more about David Whyte here is a Tedx talk that I often still watch.
https://www.ted.com/talks/david_whyte_a_lyrical_bridge_between_past_present_and_future?language=en
His website is https://davidwhyte.com/
Namaste
Maria
